I had a conversation the other day with a person from the industry who said there was a problem with caregivers not showing empathy to residents, similar to Psychopathic Personality. Is this your experience?
I believe we do have a lot of bully's working in our industry which makes me very sad but while some of it may be calculated and intentional, I believe most of it comes back to two things.
1. They have this warped understanding of their job being one that They are in charge and Tthey are there to get the person in their care to do what They tell them. After all They have to look after them!!!! They don't understand that their job does not include taking the power away from the person in their care. Does not mean they control them.
2. They don't know what empathy is. They have no conception of what it is to connect with a person, to listen, understand and be present with another person and help them get their needs met. No one ever did this for them! They had to do the best they could to SURVIVE. That is all they know. Survival means earning as much money as they can to feed themselves, send money home, buy "toys" and certainly not get emotionally involved in their work.
Do you understand what I am saying? Are there any other people who see it like I do or are there really a lot of bully's or psychopathic personality types working in Caregiving?
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Monday, January 31, 2011
Are you a dabler, a hacker, copulsive or have Mastery in your life?
I went to a very intersting educational session today run by NZ Training and Development (I would strongly recommend that educators and trainers belong to this organisation - want to know more, go to www.nzatd.org.nz. There are divisions in Auckland, Hamilton and BOP as well as Wellington and Christchurch.)
It was on Mastery. So to have Mastery you need to be passionate about what you do, practice the skills you want to develop and monitor your performance.
People who attain mastery in their life live on the edge, challenge the status quo, be committed to continually reset their script, is committed to learning and development of the self and is a life long learner.
Have you acheived mastery in your life?
To be a master you have to be patient, purposeful and persistent.
Mastery has been recognised by many and this quote by Albert Einstein describes it very well. "Anyone who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. Therefore for this reason, mastery demands the whole person"
Is this you? Do you have a cause you are devoted too?
It was on Mastery. So to have Mastery you need to be passionate about what you do, practice the skills you want to develop and monitor your performance.
People who attain mastery in their life live on the edge, challenge the status quo, be committed to continually reset their script, is committed to learning and development of the self and is a life long learner.
Have you acheived mastery in your life?
To be a master you have to be patient, purposeful and persistent.
Mastery has been recognised by many and this quote by Albert Einstein describes it very well. "Anyone who devotes himself to a cause with his whole strength and soul can be a true master. Therefore for this reason, mastery demands the whole person"
Is this you? Do you have a cause you are devoted too?
Sunday, January 23, 2011
I heard today they expect this year to be another bad year!!!
Well you have a choice whether you buy into it or not. People have bad years all the time. Just look at what the weather has been doing - and this has nothing to do with the economic climate.
I know it is difficult for people who have and are suffering hardship. Many people are affected by floods,earthquake and disasters of many different types. I am sure even if you are not affected by nature at the moment all of you at sometime will have experienced loss, hardship, pain and suffering.
It is really hard while in the midst of these trauma's but one thing for certain is that the pain and suffering doesn't last forever.
While you never forget these times, life has a habit of showing us how to get through and that good times, fun and laughter can result.
So how does all this relate to my first sentence?
The way in which we make it through the tough times is dependent on your attitude. If you think you can't, then you are right. If you think you can, then you are also right.
So if you think it is going to be a hard financial year, then you are right if you choose to buy into it. On the other hand if your attitude is one that you will always get through, there will always be enough to go round and have some left over, that you can still provide great care on a limited buget then you will be able to do all of this and more.
On the other hand if you say that you can't manage on the budget and pay for the extras that are so important, like training, then you are also right. It is called a self perpetuated prophercy.
Try this year to change the way you think and believe it is going to be a great year, that you can afford training (even if you think your budget can't), believe you have full occupancy in your facility, believe that your staff are very trainable - the list goes on. You choose your destiny.
I have worked on this philosophy for years. Yes it can get hairy at times but when you truely believe in what you are doing then a way will be found. Your prayers, wishes and desires can and will be fullfilled.
I know it is difficult for people who have and are suffering hardship. Many people are affected by floods,earthquake and disasters of many different types. I am sure even if you are not affected by nature at the moment all of you at sometime will have experienced loss, hardship, pain and suffering.
It is really hard while in the midst of these trauma's but one thing for certain is that the pain and suffering doesn't last forever.
While you never forget these times, life has a habit of showing us how to get through and that good times, fun and laughter can result.
So how does all this relate to my first sentence?
The way in which we make it through the tough times is dependent on your attitude. If you think you can't, then you are right. If you think you can, then you are also right.
So if you think it is going to be a hard financial year, then you are right if you choose to buy into it. On the other hand if your attitude is one that you will always get through, there will always be enough to go round and have some left over, that you can still provide great care on a limited buget then you will be able to do all of this and more.
On the other hand if you say that you can't manage on the budget and pay for the extras that are so important, like training, then you are also right. It is called a self perpetuated prophercy.
Try this year to change the way you think and believe it is going to be a great year, that you can afford training (even if you think your budget can't), believe you have full occupancy in your facility, believe that your staff are very trainable - the list goes on. You choose your destiny.
I have worked on this philosophy for years. Yes it can get hairy at times but when you truely believe in what you are doing then a way will be found. Your prayers, wishes and desires can and will be fullfilled.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
I'm 63 and tired
I received this today. I don't know if others are feeling like this but it sure did hit a cord with me. Maybe you are the same. If it offends anyone, then I apologise in advance.
"I'm 63 and I'm Tired"
By Robert A. Hall
I'm 63. Except for one semester in college when jobs were scarce and a six-month period when I was between jobs, but job-hunting every day, I've worked, hard, since I was 18. Despite some health challenges, I still put in 50-hour weeks, and haven't called in sick in seven or eight years. I make a good salary, but I didn't inherit my job or my income, and I worked to get where I am. Given the economy, there's no retirement in sight, and I'm tired. Very tired.
I'm tired of being told that I have to "spread the wealth" to people who don't have my work ethic. I'm tired of being told the government will take the money I earned, by force if necessary, and give it to people too lazy to earn it.
I'm tired of being told that Islam is a "Religion of Peace," when every day I can read dozens of stories of Muslim men killing their sisters, wives and daughters for their family "honor"; of Muslims rioting over some slight offense; of Muslims murdering Christian and Jews because they aren't "believers"; of Muslims burning schools for girls; of Muslims stoning teenage rape victims to death for "adultery"; of Muslims mutilating the genitals of little girls; all in the name of Allah, because the Qur'an and Shari'a law tells them to.
I'm tired of being told that out of "tolerance for other cultures" we must let Saudi Arabia use our oil money to fund mosques and mandrassa Islamic schools to preach hate in America and Canada , while no American nor Canadian group nor Australian is allowed to fund a church, synagogue or religious school in Saudi Arabia to teach love and tolerance.
I'm tired of being told I must lower my living standard to fight global warming, which no one is allowed to debate.
I'm tired of being told that drug addicts have a disease, and I must help support and treat them, and pay for the damage they do. Did a giant germ rush out of a dark alley, grab them, and stuff white powder up their noses while they tried to fight it off?
I'm tired of hearing wealthy athletes, entertainers and politicians of both parties talking about innocent mistakes, stupid mistakes or youthful mistakes, when we all know they think their only mistake was getting caught. I'm tired of people with a sense of entitlement, rich or poor, brown or white.
I'm real tired of people who don't take responsibility for their lives and actions. I'm tired of hearing them blame the government, or discrimination or big-whatever for their problems. I’m tired of them not believing it could be their own fault.
Yes, I'm damn tired. But I'm also glad to be 63. Because, mostly, I'm not going to have to see the world these people are making. I'm just sorry for my granddaughter.
Robert A. Hall is a Marine Vietnam veteran who served five terms in the Massachusetts State Senate.
There is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us sends it on!
This is your chance to make a difference.
" I'm 63 and I'm tired”. If you don't forward this you are part of the problem.
"I'm 63 and I'm Tired"
By Robert A. Hall
I'm 63. Except for one semester in college when jobs were scarce and a six-month period when I was between jobs, but job-hunting every day, I've worked, hard, since I was 18. Despite some health challenges, I still put in 50-hour weeks, and haven't called in sick in seven or eight years. I make a good salary, but I didn't inherit my job or my income, and I worked to get where I am. Given the economy, there's no retirement in sight, and I'm tired. Very tired.
I'm tired of being told that I have to "spread the wealth" to people who don't have my work ethic. I'm tired of being told the government will take the money I earned, by force if necessary, and give it to people too lazy to earn it.
I'm tired of being told that Islam is a "Religion of Peace," when every day I can read dozens of stories of Muslim men killing their sisters, wives and daughters for their family "honor"; of Muslims rioting over some slight offense; of Muslims murdering Christian and Jews because they aren't "believers"; of Muslims burning schools for girls; of Muslims stoning teenage rape victims to death for "adultery"; of Muslims mutilating the genitals of little girls; all in the name of Allah, because the Qur'an and Shari'a law tells them to.
I'm tired of being told that out of "tolerance for other cultures" we must let Saudi Arabia use our oil money to fund mosques and mandrassa Islamic schools to preach hate in America and Canada , while no American nor Canadian group nor Australian is allowed to fund a church, synagogue or religious school in Saudi Arabia to teach love and tolerance.
I'm tired of being told I must lower my living standard to fight global warming, which no one is allowed to debate.
I'm tired of being told that drug addicts have a disease, and I must help support and treat them, and pay for the damage they do. Did a giant germ rush out of a dark alley, grab them, and stuff white powder up their noses while they tried to fight it off?
I'm tired of hearing wealthy athletes, entertainers and politicians of both parties talking about innocent mistakes, stupid mistakes or youthful mistakes, when we all know they think their only mistake was getting caught. I'm tired of people with a sense of entitlement, rich or poor, brown or white.
I'm real tired of people who don't take responsibility for their lives and actions. I'm tired of hearing them blame the government, or discrimination or big-whatever for their problems. I’m tired of them not believing it could be their own fault.
Yes, I'm damn tired. But I'm also glad to be 63. Because, mostly, I'm not going to have to see the world these people are making. I'm just sorry for my granddaughter.
Robert A. Hall is a Marine Vietnam veteran who served five terms in the Massachusetts State Senate.
There is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us sends it on!
This is your chance to make a difference.
" I'm 63 and I'm tired”. If you don't forward this you are part of the problem.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Happy New Year
Well I don't think this will be so for many who live in Queensland. I am beginning to think that I live in the lucky counntry. While we here in NZ have had our share of disasters nothing of the magnitude Queesnland is experiencing could anywhere match this. I really feel for them.
2011 is really here now and I am sure before we know it, 2012 will be here. I dont want to appear the eternal pessimist as I really am an optomist, this is the fact. Busy people notice the years flying by while pessimsts see them dragging.
This year is going to see many changes in clinical update. For one all my caregiver training programmes are going on line. It is a lot of work but all worthwhile. I promise you that you will not be disappointed with the programmes that go on line.
I will keep you updated as to what, when and how of the programmes and when I go live so to speak. Watch this space.
2011 is really here now and I am sure before we know it, 2012 will be here. I dont want to appear the eternal pessimist as I really am an optomist, this is the fact. Busy people notice the years flying by while pessimsts see them dragging.
This year is going to see many changes in clinical update. For one all my caregiver training programmes are going on line. It is a lot of work but all worthwhile. I promise you that you will not be disappointed with the programmes that go on line.
I will keep you updated as to what, when and how of the programmes and when I go live so to speak. Watch this space.
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Hearing Loss
For those of you who know me, you will know I have a significant hearing loss and wear hearing aids. Hearing aids are just that an aid. They don't fix the problem.
I find accents, and people who speak very softly incredibly difficult to hear orunderstand and in large groups I often don't hear anything - it is just a whole lot of noise that doesnt make any sense.
The purpose in me writing this on the blog is I don't think people who have good hearing understand how debilitating and disabling hearing loss is. Many people just retreat into their shell and don't speak out about it.
I am not one of those people. I do speak out and I do ask questions. I havr never felt happy how I was handled by audiologists either. The reason for this is I know they understand hearing loss but I don't think they understand the people who have hearing loss.
When you go to see them or have hearing aids adjusted it is in a totally false situations - a sound proof room with audiologists who have very clear speaking voices with good clear tone and timbre.
What happens when you leave this false environment, the general noise hits you - you have suddenly faced with so much noise it can be very unsettling and make you cringe.
Do we take any of these things into considerations for people in our care who have hearing loss? I don't think so. If you don't know what it is like to be hearing impaired it is impossible to identify with a person who is.
So give a little thought when people look at you blankley, retreat to their room or misinterpret what you say. If they have hearing aids, take good care of them, make sure they are free of wax are clean and the battery is working.
Believe me, it is no fun not being able to hear. And for you, if you have good hearing, protect it and look after it. It cannot be repaired or replaced and it worthwhile treasuring.
I find accents, and people who speak very softly incredibly difficult to hear orunderstand and in large groups I often don't hear anything - it is just a whole lot of noise that doesnt make any sense.
The purpose in me writing this on the blog is I don't think people who have good hearing understand how debilitating and disabling hearing loss is. Many people just retreat into their shell and don't speak out about it.
I am not one of those people. I do speak out and I do ask questions. I havr never felt happy how I was handled by audiologists either. The reason for this is I know they understand hearing loss but I don't think they understand the people who have hearing loss.
When you go to see them or have hearing aids adjusted it is in a totally false situations - a sound proof room with audiologists who have very clear speaking voices with good clear tone and timbre.
What happens when you leave this false environment, the general noise hits you - you have suddenly faced with so much noise it can be very unsettling and make you cringe.
Do we take any of these things into considerations for people in our care who have hearing loss? I don't think so. If you don't know what it is like to be hearing impaired it is impossible to identify with a person who is.
So give a little thought when people look at you blankley, retreat to their room or misinterpret what you say. If they have hearing aids, take good care of them, make sure they are free of wax are clean and the battery is working.
Believe me, it is no fun not being able to hear. And for you, if you have good hearing, protect it and look after it. It cannot be repaired or replaced and it worthwhile treasuring.
Monday, December 13, 2010
Christmas is upon us
I don't know about you but the years just seem to be getting shorter and shorter.
Now I know that is not true for some people. It is only those who are very busy that have this problem.
I am not complaining about having this problem. It is far better than being bored.
However being busy does have it's down falls. So to overcome this, I have joined a gym. Yes this time I have CHOSEN to join a gym.
So what has this done for me?
It has relieved my back pain, helped me sleep better at night, increased my energy and overall wellbeing and encouraged me to eat less and better.
My diet is usually pretty good but what I have found is I dont have the desire to eat sweet things to the same extent. There is also and added bonus. In the first 6 weeks I have shed 2" off my hips, 1" off my waist and 1/2" off my thighs.
My weight has not been an issue for me. I have been stable for years and for me it is a healthy weight but my energy levels have increased and that is important to me.
With my overall wellbeing improved I have the energy to enjoy another new grand-daughter due next week. I already have one 3 year old grand-daughter who keeps me busy so with 2 I am going to need all the energy I can muster.
So if you too have been considering joining a gym I would recommend it. I have set my target at 3 days a week. So my recommendation is you set the number of times you want to go and get into a routine. It is then just like going to work each day - part of the day.
Now I know that is not true for some people. It is only those who are very busy that have this problem.
I am not complaining about having this problem. It is far better than being bored.
However being busy does have it's down falls. So to overcome this, I have joined a gym. Yes this time I have CHOSEN to join a gym.
So what has this done for me?
It has relieved my back pain, helped me sleep better at night, increased my energy and overall wellbeing and encouraged me to eat less and better.
My diet is usually pretty good but what I have found is I dont have the desire to eat sweet things to the same extent. There is also and added bonus. In the first 6 weeks I have shed 2" off my hips, 1" off my waist and 1/2" off my thighs.
My weight has not been an issue for me. I have been stable for years and for me it is a healthy weight but my energy levels have increased and that is important to me.
With my overall wellbeing improved I have the energy to enjoy another new grand-daughter due next week. I already have one 3 year old grand-daughter who keeps me busy so with 2 I am going to need all the energy I can muster.
So if you too have been considering joining a gym I would recommend it. I have set my target at 3 days a week. So my recommendation is you set the number of times you want to go and get into a routine. It is then just like going to work each day - part of the day.
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