Well actually no they don't. They are often shocked and horrified if you tell them they are a bully.
According to an article in Medscape written by Laura A Stokowski, the bully just sees themself as smarter, faster, or more skilled than anyone else. Unfortunatly this inflated ego is actually incorrect.
So what labels can we apply to these people to help you identify the serial bully? According to C Dellasega the author of "Girl Wars and "Mean Girls Grown Down: Adult Women Who are Still Queen Beeds, Middle Bees and Afraid-to-bees", they fall into these categories.
The super nurse - the one who does all the courses and conveys this knowledge continually so others think they are smart
The resentful nurse - the one who develops and holds grudges: pits others against others
The person who uses put downs, gossips and starts rumours - shares negativity and quick to take offense
The backstabber - cultivates friendships, then betrays them - the 2-faced person
The green with envy person - tends towards envy and bitterness
The cliquish person - the person who uses exclusion for aggression; shows favouritism and ignores others.
Do you have anyone on your staff like this? It could be you or one of your staff members or managers.
In an article I wrote for Kaitiaki some years ago, I believe the best way to manage a bully is to develop skills within yourself. If you identify them and stop playing into their hands, you will be able to manage them better.
You see the question you have to ask yourself is "why does this person affect me so" or "what do I need to do to develop the skills to stop them from making me feel powerless".
The key to managing a bully is to not let them to have power over you. However if this person is bullying residents then it does become your problem to handle.
People in care are very vulnerable. They often don't have the ability to fight back through fear of retribution and vitimisation so they don't fight back. You need to identify these people early and help them identify what they are doing.
So how will you do this? I will put this in the next blog.
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I recently resigned from my position as an RN due to bullying leaving two others behind that were getting bullied by the same person. I felt powerless, frustrated and angry with this person, myself and management for letting this problem over ride my joy for the residents and other staff I enjoyed working with. I am now more or less unemployed due to not being able to find another position within the town I live in I have let myself fall into a trap as a victim cause of this so DON'T anyone else let it go this far in your work place
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